Reinventing the old

Obviously this journey is not about giving up the things that I love or the things my family loves...but about finding better alternatives to those items.  I have two boys who would have an awfully tough time without cheese balls...so I searched and found a better alternative for them.  I also have two little boys who love a good cookie every now and then...again, I couldn't imagine them going through their lives without ever eating a cookie, so I've looked around and found a better alternative for them.  I don't think any of us can look at our lives and think we will never eat out at a restaurant, or ever eat food prepared by another person...perhaps someone who isn't following the same lifestyle plan as we are...but all things in moderation, right???  I think we could all find several items on almost every menu that would be considered "whole food"...I'm pretty happy eating a steak, baked potato and steamed veggies!!!

While doing research early on in my journey, I read an article about American's attitudes towards foods.  It talked about how we refer to certain foods as being "bad"...how many times have we heard someone say (or said ourselves) "Well, I'm going to be really bad tonight and have the _______" You fill in the blank, dessert, pasta, steak, bread...whatever it may be.  We have associated a lot of negative thoughts and feelings around what we eat.  We've limited ourselves so much in our day to day life, that when we are in a social situation where eating is accepted, you can often find people (or yourself) scarfing down foods like they've been stuck on a deserted island somewhere.  Most likely they've left that party feeling guilty, with thoughts of doing an extra fifteen minutes on the treadmill, or taking the stairs the next day.  It's amazing how we've programmed ourselves to have such a bad relationship with food.  I'm sure we all have some sort of crazy adrenaline dump when we are being "bad" and eating that huge piece of chocolate cake...after all, it sometimes feels so good to be "bad"...right???  How often do you find yourself eating because the clock says so??  Or finishing your entire plate, even though you aren't hungry, because it's there???  These habits have been deeply ingrained in our minds...along with our negative association with "bad foods"...so ingrained, most of us don't even think about it. 

The moral of the story...eat dessert!!  Maybe not the whole pie, but if you want a piece of pie after dinner (and you aren't full) eat it!!  Eat food when you are hungry, stop when you aren't.  And make sure the foods you are eating are foods you love and enjoy...you'll find your relationship with your food will change.  The article also talked about making your meals an event, have a beginning, a middle and an end.  Start to have your own routine for you meals, whether you start every supper with a prayer or a salad (or both),  make sure that you are dedicating some amount of time to just eating.  Try not to eat in front of the television or at your computer at work...there have been several studies that show we consume many more calories when we are blindly eating in front of the television or computer.  It's also important to have a conclusion to your meals, maybe a cup of tea or coffee, some quiet time to sit and talk with your spouse or children...making your meals an event helps to keep you more aware of what you are eating. 

So, today's recipe is my version of a favorite pasta dish I used to order from a local Italian restaurant.  I've added some leeks and tomatoes because the dish I ordered had no veggies!! 

Chicken Asiago Pasta with Leeks and Tomatoes

2 large chicken breasts, cooked, diced
1 lrg bag pasta (cooked to package directions)
1/2 c olive oil
2 T butter
1/4 t red pepper flakes (more or less to taste)
juice of 1 lemon
5 cloves garlic, diced
3 leeks, chopped
1/4 c parsley, chopped
1 large tomato, seeded and diced
1 c asiago cheese, grated
1/2 c Parmesan cheese, grated
salt to taste

Cook pasta of choice according to package directions.  In a medium sauce pain, combine olive oil, butter, pepper flakes, garlic, lemon and salt.  Cook over low heat for 15-20 minutes, allowing garlic to cook (watch carefully so garlic does not burn).  In the last 3 minutes of cooking time, add chopped leeks to pasta.  Drain and return to pot.  Add chicken, olive oil mixture, parsley and cheese to pasta, stir.  Add diced tomatoes, stir.  Salt to taste.  Grate fresh cheese over top of pasta before serving. 

You can use any type of pasta you prefer, I used a wider, fettucini style pasta because that's what the original recipe used.  You can also use whatever type of cheese you like.  The original recipe only used asiago, but I had Parmesan here to use, so I did.  You can also add whatever veggies you want...I kept this one simple because I hadn't made it before, but you could easily add spinach and broccoli.

So, enjoy your food...make sure if you are consuming it, it's because you are hungry and it's something you truly like...something you look forward to eating.  If you aren't looking forward to what you are eating...time to make a couple of changes...add something new to an old recipe, or work on creating one of your favorite dishes from a restaurant or maybe something your grandma used to make.  Whatever it is, make sure that you make your meals an event...not one you dread every day...but one you look forward to and sit down to enjoy!   Hope you like the recipe!!

Nutrition Education

I can say that I am constantly amazed by the lack of education that we have when it comes to our bodies and our nutrition.  I read a post online today by a mother who had taken her almost 2 year old twin to the physician's office for a check up.  The twins had been sick off and on, hadn't been eating well because of it and so they both lost weight.  The physician's suggestion to her was to get them to eat, whatever she could, even if it was junk, as long as it was something.  My jaw dropped...we wonder why our children have health issues related to obesity??  Our pediatrician's are recommending we change our children's diet to "all junk" as long as they are eating???  I couldn't believe it!! 

I guess if you consider the fact that most doctors only take very brief courses in basic nutrition during their schooling...it wouldn't be that big of a surprise...but I can't believe they feel compelled to give such advice.  I know nothing about rewiring the electrical system in your house...therefore I'm not going to give you advice and suggestions on how to do it.  I know physicians see themselves as normal, everyday people...but their patients do not.  Most of us trust our doctors and believe that what they are telling us is coming from a place of knowledge...but after working in health care, I can tell you that a lot of what physicians tell you is opinion...some times based in scientific facts...sometimes not. 

In general, we've given up a lot of our nutritional decisions to other people.  Eat what the doctor says, or what the latest diet book says, or what they tell you is "good for you" on the news or in the newspaper.  We take supplements, and drink tea because someone said they will save our heart or make us lose weight...but how many of us look into the claims??  How often to you turn that box of cereal around and look at the ingredient list??  Can you pronounce half of the things that are in your food??  Do you know what they are??  I know I didn't.  I blindly believed that if the food manufacturers are allowed to sell it to me...it couldn't possibly be harmful, right??  In this day and age, with all the loops they have to jump through, how could these chemicals not be safe??  Anytime there is a question of food safety, the manufactures first comment is almost always "It's FDA approved."  As American's, we have turned our health over to our government??  I'm not sure about any of you, but last time I checked, our government hasn't been able to successfully manage much over the last 50 years...so why am I trusting them with my health and the health of my family??? 

I guess once again, my point is to educate yourself about the foods you are consuming.  If you look at all the ingredients in your favorite cookie, look them up, learn about them and still want to eat them...go for it.  I'm not saying all food processing is bad for us...but I have to say that we've had a major shift in our health over the past 50 years...and the foods we consume play a role in that.  It's really quite simple to transform your eating habits...if you do it slowly.  There are lots of options out there.  If you would have told me six months ago that I'd be giving up artificial sweeteners and processed foods, I would have laughed in your face.  I'd thought about it several times, but thought the process would be far to difficult and not realistic for me.  What changed??  Nothing in my life changed...just my thought process about it.  I can assure you, it really is quite simple...I feel better and I know I am doing what's best for myself and my family. 

Today's recipe is quite simple, it's for a tequila lime chicken.  Super delicious recipe that is easy!! 

Tequila Lime Chicken

1/2 c tequila
1 c lime juice
1/2 c orange juice
1 T chili powder
1 T garlic, chopped
1 T cumin
1 jalapeno pepper, seeded and chopped
1/4 c cilantro
2 T salt
1 T pepper
1 whole chicken, cut into portions

Mix all ingredients together, add chicken.  Marinate at least 2 hours or overnight. 

I bought a whole chicken that had been cut up at the store and used that, but you can use whichever cuts you prefer.  I cooked the chicken on the grill and it was amazing...juicy, flavorful and delicious!!

I also found a recipe and changed it a bit to make a tequila lime BBQ sauce, which I didn't try, but will include in case any of you would like to try it!!!

Tequila Lime Barbecue Sauce

1 1/2 cups natural ketchup
1 cup molasses
1/2 cup apple cider vinegar
3 tbsp garlic powder
1 tbsp onion powder
1 tbsp black pepper
1 tbsp chili powder
2 tbsp spicy brown mustard 
1 cube of beef bullion
2 shots of tequila
3 tbsp lime juice
1 tbsp honey
Hot sauce, to taste 

Pour the ketchup, molasses, and vinegar into a saucepan on low heat. Mix well. Add remaining ingredients and stir until blended. Leave the sauce on low heat for 5 minutes, stirring occasionally. Remove from heat. You can either serve the warm BBQ sauce, baste chicken or refrigerate.

Take a little time to educate yourself today on the foods you are eating and the foods your body wishes you were eating!!!  Enjoy the recipes!

Responsibility and empathy

So, when I first started this blog, my life was in a bit of a different place...over the past couple weeks, things have gotten quite hectic.  Between my grandma's illness and subsequent passing, family visiting, and agreeing to a more demanding schedule at work, the days have flown by without a word getting typed!!  I have not abandoned my lifestyle changes...only put my writing about them on pause.  As things begin to slow down over the next few weeks...my promise is to get back on the writing train...and share my life transformations and recipes with all of you!!!

I have found my mind wandering through my families history and thoughts of my childhood a lot over the past couple weeks.  While searching through years of pictures of my grandma, visiting with family about her influence, planting our gardens, browsing through greenhouses and buying baby chickens (YEAH!) I've found myself thinking a lot about my past and the future I hope to have.  I think about what memories I'd like my children to have...and what type of life I want them to live.  I think about my desire for them to be responsible...to have responsibilities around our home.  While growing up, I knew that I had a whole family of people who were depending upon my ability not to screw up...not to give up...and who definitely needed me to work hard and pull my weight.  I grew up in such a way that I had no choice but to be empathetic with those around me...realizing that this world did not revolve around me...that there was much more to it than that.  Not only did my family depend on me, but our animals did too.  If we didn't feed the dogs, the birds, the horses...they had no way of doing it themselves...I gained a sense of responsibility...a sense of obligation.  I was very young when I started to "work".  We never got an allowance...never got paid for doing chores...we were part of the assembly...it was not an option...it was a requirement.  We learned what it meant to be loyal...learned what hard work was...learned that quitting was not an option, because there was no one there to pick up where you gave up.  We learned to make the best with what we had...cleaning 50 pheasants may not seem like much fun to most...but we found things that made us laugh...things to look forward to every time we stepped into the picking room!!  We created bonds and found love and support in our family members...the way it's supposed to be.  We learned to appreciate an afternoon of fun...and also learned to never, ever say "I'm bored"! 

I read this quote recently and it resonated with me :
"If you want children to keep their feet on the ground, put some responsibility on their shoulders."  ~Abigail Van Buren

I think we are living in a society that is greatly lacking in this regard...children don't need friends, they need parents.  As kids, we were allowed to make decisions and mistakes...but we paid for our mistakes and learned from them.  No one handed me anything on a silver platter...I didn't have lots of toys...no telephone or television in my room.  Our backyard was our playroom...we played farm and school...not Playstation.  Family was our focus...we were part of the equation...part of the solution.  No one around us had much time to be a savior...so we weren't allowed the privilege of messing up our lives and having someone there to make everything better.  We lived on what we had...and made the best out of it...nothing fancy, nothing flashy...we definitely were never keeping up with the Jones'!  We had a life filled with love, trust and adulation...what more could you ask for??  What more could you want for your own children??  I know I couldn't ask for much more for mine.  I look at my children and see what my mother must have seen in me...the want for them to do better in life that I have done...to have better and to be better.  But I can definitely say that there is much of what we had that I hope to duplicate.  I want their lives to be surrounded by love, respect and adulation...responsibility and empathy.  I want them to have their head in the clouds...but their feet on the ground...and definitely responsibility on their shoulders.  So...how could this recipe possibly tie in with that...I have no idea...besides the fact that I brought it to a family function and it was well received!!!  It's another quinoa recipe...one you should add to your list of must makes for this summer!!!  It's great as a salad, but also as a dip with tortilla chips!!  Hope you enjoy!!

Mexican Quinoa Salad
 1 1/2 c water
1 c quinoa
1/2 bell pepper, seeded and chopped
2 green onions, chopped fine
2 roma tomatoes, chopped
1 can black beans (rinsed well)
1 c frozen corn, thawed
1 tsp cumin
1/4 c fresh cilantro, chopped
3/4-1 c salsa
1 T olive oil
1 lime, juiced
salt and pepper to taste

Salt water, heat to boil in a medium sized sauce pan.  Rinse quinoa, add to boiling water.  Reduce heat and cover, cook until liquid is absorbed, approximately 20 minutes.  Remove from the heat and let cool.

When quinoa has cooled, add remaining ingredients and refrigerate.  You can serve it immediately, but the flavors will develop more if you allow it to cool for an hour or so. 

 
My mom and grandma were right...a little hard work didn't kill me...it built me up and gave me wings!  Hope you enjoy the recipe and share it with your family!

Not every hit is a homerun...

So...up until Friday night...every new recipe I tried went off without a hitch!  They all were simple to make, tasted great and my family loved them...Friday night that was not the case.  It was a simple, unassuming meal, steak, baked sweet potatoes, salad with lemon vinaigrette...and some homemade herbed ricotta cheese spread on whole wheat Italian style bread.  Sounds good doesn't it??  Well...it wasn't terrible...wasn't inedible...but it sure wasn't a home run!!  This dinner requires some tweeking...some redo's...but that's life right?? 

Not every step we take in life is a solid step...not everyone leads us exactly where we need to be.  Sometimes it's one step forward and two steps back...sometimes we feel like we are walking on a treadmill and getting nowhere.  Then there are those times...those times in life when it all falls into place...when everything works...when we step up to the plate, get a solid hit...and it's a home run!  I've taken several mis-steps in life...I guess we all have, but I have to see it's those times in life that keep us going through the treadmill times...the feeling of success...of doing better than we anticipated...making more than we thought we could.  I have spent the majority of my life attempting to achieve...again, I suppose most of us have...but I have spent a lot of days thinking about how I could have done things differently or how I could have been better...reaching for the stars and setting goals that feel impossible.  I have spent very little time relishing in successes or congratulating myself for what I have achieved.  Part of this overhaul process has led me to re-evaluate how I look at myself and where I put myself in my life.  So many times when I feel as though I've "failed" I turn to my mom...and so many times in life she's said to me "You would never expect someone else to live up to the expectations you place on yourself"...this statement is so very true.  Just as I didn't even think about feeding my body in the same way I feed my children's...didn't put myself in a place of importance...I rarely put myself in the same place I put other people.  I don't forgive myself as easily as I forgive others, I don't give myself the same window of leniency I give others...and I sure as heck don't see the value in myself that I so easily find in people around me.  I'm not sure why...don't know when I stopped thinking that I mattered....I suppose I could easily say becoming a mom or a wife forced me to push myself and to place myself lower on the ladder of significance in life...but to be honest it started long before that.  I should be grateful for my inability to delight in my personal successes...the drive to do more has brought me a lot of good things in life...but it sure does get tiring sometimes. 

So a new goal in this process...look at my everyday successes as what they are...successes!  Celebrate the little things and give myself a little liberty when it comes to "failures".  I'm going to do my best to start treating myself like I would my best friend...or my children...and be a little more gracious to myself. 

So here are the somewhat successful recipes...followed by changes that I plan on making next time.  I don't have pictures right now...but I will edit to add them later! 

Lemon Vinaigrette

1/2 c olive oil
1/4 c lemon juice
zest of one lemon
2 T sugar
1 clove garlic, chopped
Salt and pepper to taste.

Seems simple enough right??  If you like really tart dressings...this one's for you!!  It needs a super strong tasting green to stand up to it!  I think if I made it again...I'd use 1/8 c lemon juice and 1/4 c of fresh orange juice.  The sugar I added wasn't nearly enough to cut the bite...woo...my lips are still smacking!!! 

Homemade ricotta cheese with fresh herbs

4 c whole milk
2 c cream
1 T salt
4 T vinegar

Heat milk, cream and salt to a boil.  Remove from heat.  Add vinegar and stir.  Let sit for 3-5 minutes, until milk mixture begins to separate.  Transfer to a cheese cloth covered colander over a bowl.  Let drain for 10-15 minutes.  Chop any fresh herbs you like and add to cheese mixture. (I used scallions, dill and lemon thyme)  Refrigerate.  Serve on crusty bread or crackers. 

So the failure with this recipe wasn't the recipe itself...it was the process.  After I had started warming the milk mixture...I realized I'd forgotten to buy cheese cloth...so this led to a google search for replacements...let me tell you...no matter what you read on google...there is no good replacement for cheese cloth in this recipe...I tried them all!!  I finally used a fine, metal mesh colander that worked just fine!  I made a whole wheat rustic bread recipe to serve it on...also didn't work well...to dense of a texture and flavor for this light spread...but it tasted fantastic on crackers!  You could use this for a base to any flavors...it was super good!!!

I will post the bread recipe tomorrow...I'm working all weekend...so cooking (and writing) get put on the back burner!! 

Take time today and forgive yourself for your shortcomings...just as you would forgive your sister...your mother...your friend.  Remember that every stumble in life helps us to grow and become the people who we are striving to become...that's what I'll be doing...well, trying to do...sure hope I don't fail...

Oh yeah...Happy Mother's Day!

Spring is coming...right??

So...although it seems spring has been slow to start...I'm sure it is going to come this year...right??  I spent the afternoon yesterday walking around the yard with the boys and enjoying the flowers and plants that May has brought...and thanking God for the sunshine!!!  I can't help but be excited about all that spring and summer brings for our family.  Swimming, boating, vacation, four-wheeler rides, grilling, gardening...some of my favorite things...thoughts of these things are what keep me going all winter long!!!

Flowering pear tree blossoms

It seems the start of spring for me is always marked by putting my hands in the soil...getting our garden started!  We planted some seeds and got them started in the house, hopefully we can get things planted next week.  Gardening has always brought me joy and fulfillment.  The thought of planting and producing our own food...not dependent upon anyone but ourselves...just gives me a sense of accomplishment!!!  Terry tells me that gardens are more work than they are worth...some days I can say I agree, but when I'm standing in the sun, feeling the warm summer breeze, picking and eating fresh green beans...it all seems worthwhile!!  We aren't capable of producing all the varieties of fruits and vegetables we will want through the summer, so we will still find ourselves taking trips to the farmer's market.
This is the perfect time of year to try new things...to add new veggies to recipes you already enjoy.  Produce prices are much lower this time a year and the produce tastes so much better. 
We all have graduation parties, weddings, family reunions and summer barbecues on the horizon....although I am dedicated to using up left-overs and care packages from last week, so I'm not cooking today...the recipe I'm sharing is one of my all time favorite summer salads!!

Summer Pasta Salad

3/4 c yogurt ranch dressing
8 oz whole week fusilli pasta
1 c broccoli florets
1 c artichoke hearts, quartered
1 zucchini, diced
1 cucumber, diced
1/2 red onion, thinly sliced
1/2 c frozen peas, thawed
1 c cherry tomatoes, halved
1/2 c grated Parmesan cheese
1/2 c pitted and halved black olives
salt and pepper to taste

Cook pasta according to package directions.  Place broccoli in a strainer; drain cooked pasta in the same strainer.  Run cool water over all and drain well.  Transfer pasta and broccoli into a serving bowl.  Add remaining ingredients and toss gently to coat.  Store covered in refrigerator until serving time. 

You can make your own ranch dressing pretty simply, but you can also find some great yogurt based dressings in the produce department of the grocery store.  This recipe is pretty flexible, you could add or remove things you like or dislike.  It's also a great recipe to pair with hamburgers or steak for a fast, simple, and delicious supper. 

So...take a walk around your local farmer's market and pick up a couple things you've never tried before...or maybe something you used to enjoy but haven't had for a long time.  Stick a couple tomato plants in pots on your deck or clear a little spot in your backyard.  Spring is a time of new beginnings, it evokes thoughts of renewal and hope for a better future.  Use the energy that the universe provides during springtime to jump start your own process of renewal and takes steps towards a better future!!  Hope you enjoy the recipe!

Boys and Chloe enjoying a walk through the yard

Signs of a new beginning, a fresh start...all the wonder that spring brings!

Moving forward...but always remembering

So...the "ceremonies" for saying good-bye to my Grandma have been completed.  I was able to find the strength within to stand up at her funeral and read a memorial that I had written.  A lot of it came from my blog entry..with some editing, of course.  It was difficult, but it felt like the right thing to do.  A way to honor who she had been to me and all that she had done for me....to put my fears aside...share my joy and sadness, laughter and tears.  She was an amazing woman, who taught me, molded me and inspired me...I'm hoping to take all the good and carry it with me through my life. 

My grandma spent much of her adult life molding and teaching young people...either her children, grandchildren or great grandchildren.  When I reflect on her life...I find her ability to be patient and her willingness to give us what we needed, then stand back and let us learn amazing.  I hope to keep those thoughts in my mind as I raise my boys.  My nephew Blake told my sister not to be too sad, cause she will carry all the things Grandma taught her with her as she goes through life, so she'll never really be gone...which is so true...I guess Andrea has already done a pretty darn good job of teaching and molding!!!

I've already written about some of my food memories...but another one of the many I have with my Grandma is about her lamb cake.  She would make at least one lamb cake every year...usually one for Easter, but then you could usually find a lamb cake at spring birthday parties.  I never asked her why she started make the lamb cake or where she got the mold.  I don't know if it's something her mother did...or maybe something she got as a wedding gift...I guess I'll never know for sure.  All I do know is that the lamb cake was her "thing"...something special she did for special occasions.  So when I sat in the hospital with her over Easter...I thought about that lamb cake...I knew that I HAD to make that lamb cake!  So two days after she passed...we gathered at my sister's house for that very task.  Now...I also never asked her for the recipe for her lamb cake...I haven't searched her home, but my guess is it's not something she had written down.  So, I searched the internet, and this is the basic recipe that I used:

Whole Wheat Lamb Cake

2 1/4 c Whole Wheat Cake Flour
2 1/2 t baking powder

1/2 t salt

1 1/4 c white sugar

1/2 c butter

1 c milk

1 t vanilla extract

4 egg whites

Grease and flour your mold.  Preheat oven to 375 degrees.  Sift cake flour, then sift again with baking powder and salt.  Set aside.  In a large bowl, cream together butter and sugar until fluffy.  Add the flour mixture and milk alternately to butter mixture, mix batter til smooth after each addition.  Add vanilla.

In a large glass or metal bowl, beat egg whites til soft peaks form.  Fold 1/3 of egg mixture into flour mixture to help lighten it.  Fold in remaining egg whites. 

Fill face side of the mold.  Place the lid on the mold.  Put mold on cookie sheet and bake for 50-55 minutes until you can insert a wooden skewer or toothpick into steam holes and it comes out clean. 

Remove cake from oven, allow to cool for 15 minutes.  Remove lid, allow to cool for another 5 minutes.  Unmold cake and place upright on a platter.  (A couple of the recipes I read said to let the cake cool completely on a cooling rack before sitting it upright, but we had no issues)

Out of the oven...awaiting the cooling process

Lid off!

Unmolded and standing up!

You never knew when you cut into Grandma's lamb cake whether or not your piece would have a couple toothpicks in it.  The hardest part about making this cake seems to be keeping it in one piece.  We lucked out...we only had a little chunk of the bottom of the cake that stuck...we just pulled it out and stuck it back on the cake and you couldn't tell the difference.  Some of the recipes I read talked about cooking it in two halves and sticking it together with icing...but Grandma's mold has steam holes in one side so that wouldn't really work.  My sister Andrea made the icing and my brother in law Chris, the family cake decorator, did the piping.  We used mini M&Ms for eyes and almond slices for the ears and nose.  Here's the final product:

When Grandma decorated it, she just spread frosting over the cake...sometimes she covered the cake with coconut too.  She usually used raisins for eyes and the nose...I think almost anything would work. 

I think you can measure your success in your life by what you leave behind.  I don't mean money or possessions...but the things that really matter...the things that can make the world a better place.  Grandma had seven children, 19 grandchildren and 17 great grandchildren...all who will carry a bit of her a long with them through life.  My goal...to take what she has taught me and modeled for me...and share that with the world.  Her passing has solidified my need to continue to write, to share and to "teach" in my own way...and I will continue to do so in her honor.  I imagine my memories of her will find their way onto this blog quite often and her influence in my life and my cooking will continue to shine through.  Every time I tell my kids "toot toot Malone" or sing them "The Animal Fair", I will remember that I need to continue to be the person that she expected me to be. Hope you find the time to make your own lamb cake!!!!

Life changes...

So...I haven't been blogging the last week and a half because my grandma got very sick...I was spending all my free time in the hospital.  Unfortunately, she had wounds on her legs that wouldn't heal...after several years of battling infection successfully...the infection took over and she passed quietly and peacefully.  It was probably the saddest days of my life thus far...you see, my Grams wasn't just a Grandma...sure, she loved me and my sisters unconditionally like most Grandma's do...but she was different.  First and foremost...she helped my mom deliver all of us at home...which I'm sure helped our bonds become stronger.  Secondly, my dad was not a good dad...I won't get into it all...but my Grandma became our other parent...she stepped into the role without hesitation.  She was one of the few people in my young life who made me feel like she wanted me around.  My grandma had the patience of a saint...and never seemed to run out of the want and desire to teach and mold us.  My mom says she would call and ask for us to come and spend the weekend with her...yes...all five of us!  My grandma helped me learn how to sew, to cook, to swim, to crochet...she taught me about flowers and gardening.  She sat through many dance performances and several randitions of "Andrea and Billie Jo's Water Show"...and she always clapped at the end!!!  She held me and rocked me when I needed it...and held my hand when I needed her support.  My grandma taught me what hard work was...she was a hard worker all her life....and she taught me to never allow myself or anyone else to stand in my way.  She taught me to appreciate all that I had...even if I didn't have a lot of possesions or monetary items....I still had a lot to be thankful for. 
My grandma taught me that giving of myself provides the greatest rewards...she spent her life entertaining and cooking for anyone who would eat!  Here are some of the lessons my grandma taught me:

1. Everything tastes better cooked in bacon fat
2. No recipe can be made "low-fat"
3. If two is good...four is better
4. Always make a ham AND a turkey
5. A meal is not complete without buns...or homemade bread
6. Corn is THE vegetable
7. Every breakfast menu must contain bacon or sausage...sometimes both
8. You must save the bacon and sausage drippings...see #1
9. You can make everything yourself...it's not that hard...it tastes better and it's cheaper
10. There's no alternative to butter...except lard

I'm sure I could go on and on...but you get the drift.  Today I will say good-bye to my Grams...someone who has been there for me every step of the way.  I sit and wonder how I'll make it through life's events without having her to share them with...but I guess I'll still be sharing them with her...just in a different way.  Life changes...sometimes for the good, sometimes it seems for the bad...but there are always reasons for the changes...we just don't know them yet.